In a Rut

 

Several years ago, my mom and I attended a business workshop. I cannot remember exactly what the instructor was talking about, but I remember the illustration he gave vividly. He said if we keep doing the same thing repeatedly, our brain is trained to follow that pattern. It becomes like a horse plowing a field or a pony giving rides, going in a circle, following the same track. We begin to do things without even thinking. For example, brushing our teeth with the same hand, driving the same route to work, repeating the same activities throughout our week. Our brain becomes stuck in the same pattern. To achieve new goals, you need to set a new pattern. “Do not remember the past events; pay no attention to things of old. Look, I am about the do something new; even now it is coming. Do you not see it? Indeed, I will make a way in the wilderness, rivers in the desert.” Isaiah 43:18-19 (CSB)

Now that it is April and I am one month in from beginning this blog, how am I doing? My first goal was to have our new bikes at least purchased by April. We bought and paid for them a few weeks ago and were waiting for them to be shipped to the store to be assembled, with a different handlebar than what comes custom with the bike. As I write this, my husband received an email stating that they are ready to be picked up and we plan to do so by the end of this week.

I was released from Physical Therapy on March 22^nd after attending once a week for five weeks. I followed the plan, PT exercises every other day and riding bike on most of the other days, completing an average of 5 miles, three times a week. Week one, my legs began to feel better. Week two, they took a downturn, and I couldn’t really pinpoint why. They were achy and heavy by the end of each day. I was frustrated and in tears. Weeks three and four they were back to feeling pretty good. During my visit in week four I asked when I could start walking again. I was curious to see whether things were progressing because I was not doing any extra walking or if the exercises were effective in building the support muscles. I was told I could begin to take walks but was warned to keep them between a half mile to three-quarters of a mile. She said, “I do not want to hear of you going out for three miles.” After being released, I was hit with a head cold (sore throat, runny nose, achy and tired) and the Easter holiday. I skipped out on my exercises and did not take walks. I did, however, continue to meet my friend four days that week to ride bike. My legs are beginning to ache again this week. Is it because I slacked, or could it be from the damp weather?

As I’ve said before, I decided not to eat any sweets during the month of March, except for March 16^th (see previous blog post “There Will be Cake”). I feel like this was helpful in regaining control over food, as was also restricting my daily eating to a twelve-hour period which I feel I am sticking to successfully. I don’t feel like I have been obsessing over food as I was before the accountability of this blog. However, March is over, and sweets are now back on the table. We must wait and see how I handle this restored freedom.

Since my initial weigh in on March 4^th, I have managed to lose 9.8 pounds. My gut reaction is to become discouraged. However, as I write this, I realize that’s almost 10 pounds in only four weeks and that is something to be proud of! My first weight loss goal would be to lose a total of 32 pounds. I knew the first 10-15 would come off relatively easy. It’s the other 15-20 that will require extra effort. I go back and forth with whether I want to put numbers out there for the public to see. After all, I’m not overly concerned with what number I weigh except that I think it will help with my knee condition because, to be honest anyway, when I was at my lowest weight as an adult, I still didn’t look at myself and feel any “thinner”. It’s really the internal vision of myself that needs to change. I need to focus my attention on God alone when those cravings come. I need to set goals and have a concrete plan on how to reach them. I will make it a priority to work on this throughout the month of April. I need to get out of this rut and make a new path. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed away, and see, the new has come!” 2 Corinthians 5:17 (CSB) I am ready to create a new pattern and see what new will come.