April Showers

Where is this month going and how did it get to be April 17th already?! I wrote on April 3rd in my blog titled, "In a Rut" that I would make it a priority to come up with goals and a concrete plan to achieve them. In complete honesty, I have not done that. Actually, it doesn't seem from the outside that I have done much during this month. My days seem to pass lately without giving much conscious thought throughout the day to anything. I am on autopilot. The weather has been going back and forth between rainy days and sunny days, cooler temps and warmer temps just as my mind goes back and forth between giving myself permission to rest after harder workdays or to push through and keep being productive. To add to my brain fog, I have two children graduating in the next two months, one from college and one from high school. There are things added to my to-do list on a daily basis, it seems. I'm starting to feel the pressure to make the most of these sentimental, most amazing achievements while, at the same time, finding it difficult to complete my usual daily tasks. These "lasts" are hard and beautiful all wrapped into one. I want to remember every detail, and yet, my brain feels like a jumbled mess. Naps are my coping mechanism, so most days, the option to rest wins out.

Check-in time: How have my exercise and nutrition goals been going? 

Let's start with the cons. The past two weeks, my legs have been sore again. PT exercises and walks have been sporadic. When I do walk, I can't go at a fast pace and my knees start to ache before I even reach a full mile. My water intake has decreased as I have been giving in to more diet sodas than I had set as my original goal. I am not any closer to getting back to running as I was when I started this blog. 

Now for the pros. We picked up our new bikes on April 5th. Woohoo! I have been continuing to ride five miles at least three days a week. My PT exercises and walks ARE sporadic which is better than nothing. I am continuing to eat better for the most part. I have cut down on foods high in sugar quite a bit and have continued to intermittently fast twelve hours each day. Twelve hours to eat, twelve hours to not eat. When we do go out to eat, I am mindful of what I am consuming and try to adjust my choices at other meals around this fact. I emailed a Physical Therapist who specializes in getting athletes back to running after meniscus tears. He is not local, and I have not heard back from him yet, but I am hoping he will have some helpful pointers for me. 

To be fully honest with you, I am not really feeling this blog post. I thought as I started to write, thoughts would organize and come together, but with nothing new to update you on, I'm coming up blank. However, I promised to bring you along the "JourKNEE" for the good, the bad and the ugly. This period of time happens to fall in to the latter two categories. Life sometimes is messy, and it takes all the energy you have just to get through daily tasks. That's where I'm at. I am anticipating that as some of these bigger milestone moments pass by, I will be able to refocus on what my new goals should be, and we can make some forward progress. In the meantime, I will keep a steady pace. "You, God, showered abundant rain; you revived your inheritance when it languished." Psalms 68:9 (CSB) 

I looked up the definition of languish. The dictionary defines it as "(of a person or other living thing) lose or lack vitality; grow weak or feeble." and gives an example "plants may appear to be languishing simply because they are dormant." I may appear to be in a dormant state but am reminded that April showers bring May flowers.